Edinburgh: Mistakes & Milkshakes Part 2


Generic picture of the Edinburgh fringe crowd.

In part 1: I covered my mistakes and offered advice before heading over to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in 2014.

Part 2: Will cover all the mistakes I made when I got there.

Arrive early if you can:

With the price of everything so high in Edinburgh, it can make money sense not to get there until the day of your show. But arriving even one day early will allow you to get set up and figure out all the logistics that need to be done.

Like where is the nearest Tesco so I can dump all my coins from my bucket money into the self-service machine, to avoid dirty looks from the cashier when I pay for my sandwich using only 10p coins.

I arrived the day of my first show. My flight got delayed which meant I arrived with only a few hours before the start of my show. My flyers were sent to the wrong place to further add to the panic. All the hassle and stress added to me having a bad first show. I don’t know what to blame the other bad shows I had on do.

Bring another human being with you

Some of you may have these things called “friends”. If you have any of them over there with you kindly ask them to watch the door for you. Chances are you be busy flyering before the show to do it yourself.

Even just holding the door and guiding people, It’s a great help. In the end, they can hold the bucket for you so those sneaky bastards don’t get out without paying before you come off the stage.

Sadly I didn’t have this going over. My best friend at the time was going over with his own show. We planned to help each other out and even run a compilation show together. But a few months beforehand we had a massive falling out.

If we both still ran the compilation show. It would have all been pointless fighting, arguing in front of others and heavy drinking or what we call Christmas in Ireland.

Start/Finish on time

This wasn’t a problem for me. But the show before me did have issues with keeping time.

It was bad enough they went over their time but it was made worse by them deciding to hang around the stage afterward. Just Chatting.

If the previous show overruns it doesn’t mean you should too. It sucks to lose 5/10 minute of your show due to previous act’s ruddiness but you have to think of the people coming on next. 

Slut it up

With doing my own show and now having to run the compilation show by myself I only did a couple of guest spots.

Looking back I wish done more. Get as many guest spots as you can. Not only is it good in terms of getting more stage time as but it can help get more people to your show especially if you flyer them on the way out.

Bucket speech

I’ve seen a lot of bucket speeches (For those that don’t know at the end of the “free” show the act will ask for donations from the audience to be dropped into a bucket on the way out.)

I saw ones where I know the act lied, X-Factor sob story style, just to get more money. Another act got aggressive about how much people should put money in.
Some were too shy and embarrassed to ask for anything.

I found it best, to be honest. Most people know how expensive it is to run a show and just ask nicely to put something in. If your show is good, you won’t have a problem collecting money.

Do drink, drugs and have unprotected sex.

I read a lot these advice pieces about Edinburgh. There always end with boring advice about eating healthy, don’t drink and get plenty of sleep.
Who the hell am I to tell you what to do. Go drink as much as you want, eat shit and get genital warts. Just be there when you’re supposed to and be funny.

Upcoming gigs:

Sunday. June 24. Old Fort Quarter Festival. Main Street, Port Laoise. 7.30 pm.


Tuesday. July 3rd. Camden Comedy (Headliner). Anseo, Bar, Camden Street. Co. Dublin. 9.00 pm.

A Link to a recent set I did:

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